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I spent an interesting weekend with old friends and neighbors. Not the same friends all weekend, but different groups at different functions. As the weekend was coming to an end, I was thinking what to write this week’s article about. I like to use topics from the week but somehow nothing was jumping out until I had this Eureka moment. There was a common theme that ran right through every group and that was about lying and the effects it had on different people.

One couple was all upset because they had a new hardwood floor installed and after only 4 months the floor was buckling. When my friend called the people who did the work, they said they told them that the floor they selected will sometimes do that, especially in very humid conditions.  They live in Florida—when is it not humid in July? They were never told that; the installer was lying.  When they called the store that sold them the flooring, the store couldn’t be any nicer and came right down to inspect it and contacted the manufacturer immediately. They asked why the installer told them the bit about humidity. That was easy. They didn’t want to be responsible for anything and made up a lie. They liked the installer but because of the lie they no longer believed anything they said.

So here are some questions to think about.

• Have any of you ever lied to customer?

• Is lying bad?

• Are some lies OK and others not? 

• Has an employee ever lied to you? Or have you ever lied to an employee?

• Have you ever exaggerated a point to a customer?

• Has a sales rep ever told you that “everyone’s buying it”? We all know that  not everybody is buying it. So is it OK to exaggerate a little in a sales situation or does the sales rep  lose some of their credibility for that exaggeration? These are issues we face everyday.

Many of you have heard the stories from my store about how one of my salespeople who worked in the store for years would constantly lie to people about the size she was giving them. And many times she would rip the size out and tell them it was a size they wanted to hear. Customers loved her but she was a liar. So are white lies OK?

How do you handle it when an employee calls in sick when you know they aren’t sick? Do you just accept it? Many of us do, because if we accuse them we could create an issue that will end up in a bigger mess than the lie. But what happens if it’s a family member? One of my friends was supposed to have a special lunch with her son and fiancé only to get a call from her son telling her how sick he was, how he had to go to sleep, and cancelled the lunch. He was lying and anyone she told the story to knew he was lying but she didn’t want to accept that. When someone confronted her and said he was and she should just accept it, my friend almost attacked her and now wants nothing to do with this long time mutual friend. She was only telling the truth, but it cost a friendship.  The rest of us all lied to her and we agreed that it was too bad he got sick and even  suggested home remedies. So the liars still have a friend but the outspoken person who told the truth lost a friend.

What happens when you are so excited about a new product that just came into the store and you  share it with your employees? Do your employees  lie to you and tell you how great it is  and you find out later they are lying? Can you ever look at the employee the same way again?

Can you ever look at a company or store that lies to you the same way? A major department store that you are all familiar with sent out a sale flyer announcing a big sale with an extra 15% OFF coupon for the holiday weekend. So what did I expect? Marked down merchandise with an extra 15% off. That was not true because the majority of the merchandise in the store was exempt from the extra 15% off and most of the merchandise wasn’t even on sale.  Yes, in the small print it had all of the exemptions but the type face was so small I didn’t read it. Every item I selected was NOT on sale.  When I finally found a piece of luggage to buy and tried to use the coupon, I was told that the markdown was better. Huh? I didn’t get it.  So my impression of the store is terrible and I refuse to ever go back to buy anything from this store.  Why? Because they lied to me. I don’t like when people lie to me. NOONE does.

I can’t tell you that sometimes it’s OK to lie in certain situations. That is an ethical question for you to answer for yourself. However, there are two points that are common in any situation of ethics.

1. When we see or encounter a company that is not ethical and lies to us we can never look at that company the same way again and we usually stop doing business with them. We want to do business with businesses we trust.
2. We must be ethical in our dealings because we will turn friends, customers, and employee away from us.  

So is the little white lie OK? Maybe but it could cost you a customer forever. It’s just something to consider. Now you do some soul searching.