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I lost one of my best friends at 7:08 on Friday morning July 18th. My Uncle Ben, my godfather died of pneumonia at the young age of 95. I had been his legal guardian for the past 6 years, after his wife died. Uncle Ben was the embodiment of the American Dream that we all can learn from and all need to be reminded of.

My uncle was a Mathematical Savant. He could look at a column of numbers and tell you what they added up to without any hesitation. It was as if he was a magician with numbers. But as bright as he was,  he dropped out of school in the 9th grade to go to work to help support  his family during the depression. When he was 21 years old, his father was killed in an automobile  accident and he and my mother  moved the four  younger brothers and  sisters and mother  to the Boston area.  

He eventually got married, worked hard, saved his money and borrowed from all of his relatives and even a little from the bank to be able to buy a food distribution business. Unfortunately, the business failed within 18 months.  He did something that is almost unheard of today. He paid every penny back with interest. It took him 10 years before the last payments were made.  He believed that your name, your integrity and what it meant to other people is who you are. He believed in personal BRANDING although he never called it that.

He later went on to become successful in commercial real estate beyond what he could have ever imagined. He had an unusual way of negotiating–he didn’t. He never would insult or put down what he was buying. Either the deal worked or it didn’t work. But to try to beat someone up just for the sake of winning something was not his style.  Did sellers come back with lower prices? Yes, but he never asked.

Ben believed and taught me something I have lived by. A deal must be good for both parties or it is not good for either party.  Life had taught him that nickel and diming could end up hurting the buyer. You get more from a happy seller that one that you just aggravated. He was a hard nosed businessman but always wanted win/win relationships.

He also believed that there has to be one person worrying about paying back debts and it had better not be the lender. If someone ever reneged on a commitment that had made, he would never do business with them again. Yes, it was just that simple but that’s the reputation or brand he developed.  As tempting as other alternatives might have been, he stayed true to his values and believed it was those ideals that made him that successful.

Lastly, he was a strong believer in the importance of charity and service to your community. He never respected anyone who didn’t give back or ignored the importance of charity. Ben was laid to rest today but the world didn’t lose an honorable man because his story will serve as an inspiration and the way to do business for me and the rest of my family for years to come. If you read the definition of the rags to riches story, The American Dream, just think of my Uncle Ben. It was great sharing a life with a man who made a difference.